...my heart speaking...

I've met you, on the 11th of October 05..
For few months prior that, I've been watching you play your games in the court..
I've been secretly hoping you'd notice me..

And meeting you, was a very memorable day.
On an instant I knew you were special to me.

Friendship bloomed.
Admiration... to Love.

27th of March 06, we became an 'us'...

Everyday with you, I considered heaven..

I almost left for the US,
But I wanted to be here..
With you.
Good thing it didn't push through..

We survived,
In a new world here..
We lived a new life,
Far different back in college..

We've had problems, challenges,
Mistakes...
Small ones, to major matters..
We stood by each other,
Supported...

We lived happily, and contented,
As I thought we were..

Then, came her...
I thought hell came over.

Everything was ruined.
Everything was gone.

Love, Trust...
You...

I called everything off,
But realized can't live without you...

I needed you back...
You wanted me back...
I accepted you back...

Holidays, it was nice...
Didn't thought it would be our last...

Then we're back,
To our former life
To the past,

Pain refreshed...
All coming back,
Realized,
I'm not over it,
Still hurting,
And I can't live with it any longer..
I can't trust..

Jan 07, 2007...
I decided, I'm done...
I want this to stop.
And that was the end..

That was what I thought..

I was okay with my life...
I've moved on,
I was happy...
I've lived a new life,
Away, and apart from you..

We met new people...

Then came you,
And by July,
I took the risk,
To have you back again,
I knew, I loved you,
I still loved you..
I was happy,
Initially..

We were okay,
Perhaps, we assumed we were okay...

Then you've been acting strange,
Or to say,
You were becoming a stranger,

I don't see you,
I can't feel you,
I'm missing your love...
I'm missing my hon..

Then an incident broke the silence.
Yes, there is a problem.
There had been a problem..
That we've been blinding ourselves with..

Space was needed,
To think, to find one's self..

I've been trying to look for signs,
That you, are still there, that you are still mine...
But all I feel and see, is emptiness...
You're gone.

End of year 2007...
Became the end of the relationship that we had..

The decision to find ourselves,
Ended up, finding out that we needed to be end this...

A relationship isn't only built on love..
But also in trust..companionship..
And both, should grow, and mature in it..

But we've drifted apart...

Any 3rd parties involved?
None.
As far as I know, and wouldn't want to know - none.

All I know is, I needed to grow up for now,
And you too..

I wanted out..
and I know,
This is what is needed,
If this is right..
I don't know..
But I've prayed to Him,
To guide me in my decision...

I loved you, so much...
And I'm happy, coz'
I know I've made you feel that..

You recently told me..
That you're sorry for giving me mostly pain...
And I told you,
I loved you, and I don't have regrets loving you..
Pain was part of it..
The more I withstood those hurtful moments..
The more I'm strengthened the love I had in you..

Only this time,
It's different...
My heart is tired...
I just want to be freed...
I want to grow, mature...
I won't rush on love...
True Love waits, as my bestfriend always say.

Last words..
I know, I had my own share of mistakes,
misgivings...
I'm sincerely sorry...

I love you,
sabi nga nila, masyado kitang minahal ...
Heck, true enough.

I just needed to let go this time..

Thank You.

Goodbye to "us".